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12/14/2010

Boy, did they pick the wrong houshold

I got this in the mail:


"Blah blah, blah, survey on TV watchage, yadda, yadda, yadda..."

If only they knew what my TV looked like:


Hey, but don't let those rabbit-ears fool you--that old RCA is a lean, mean, multi-media MACHINE! I mean, just look at the wood panelling! Stand in awe of a remote-control that USED TO BE ABLE TO CHANGE THE CHANNELS, and TURN THE VOLUME UP AND DOWN! And check out that sweet late-nineties DVD player! Nothing but the best, I always say!

...

So, "nielsen," if that is your real name, why don't I just tell you the answers to your "special opportunity" right now--I don't like surveys.  I don't watch TV.  In fact, I think that TV is the mainstream media's way of brainwashing the masses with their hand-picked information and entertainment.  "The better to subjugate, you," and all that.  You lost me when FOX canceled Firefly.  If I decide to return your little white-and-blue envelope, don't expect any of the answers to be true.  Or even grounded in your plane of reality. 

And stop bugging me.

2 comments:

doubletrouble said...

"...TV is the mainstream media's way of brainwashing the masses..."

I agree. I don't watch (no antenna signal here anyway), & I just tell folks that it'll rot yer brain.

OTOH, if you resist the indoctrination, you just want to shoot the cursed thing anyway.

bluesun said...

Walking home from school at night is scary. Every. Single. House. The TV is on at the dinner table. Makes me think of zombies, or something...